This started as a response to a thought-provoking comment (the title to this note, without a question mark). As I explored my attitude about the idea of happiness needing no reason further, and my line count got longer, I decided "what the hell" and am making a bloggedy-note about it.
I'm reluctant to go, as a >general< rule, with the idea of embracing happiness as such without further thought. For starters, my caution comes from having read too much philosophy, wherein there is a particular brand that posits happiness as the raisons d'être in the choices we make. I agree with a common critique of that view, pointing out that it's just as, or maybe even more, important to be happy about the right kinds of things. I won't go into the minutia, but just say I take to heart the thought of being aware of the things that buoy or sink my moods, and strive to be balanced about it all. In the case at hand (feeling full of something like champagne bubbles sometimes after yoga), whatever it is in yoga that buoys me, I have no idea. It's not simply the practice itself, because the sensation in question doesn't happen like clockwork. When it does happen, I'm immensely grateful and don't think for a second it's coming from a bad place. But at the same time, I don't know where it's coming from, either, so it has me a little perplexed.
I've done all kinds of exercise, so when a very intelligent friend of mine said, "it sounds like endorphins" I could see where she was coming from, but not agree. It's a very peculiar sort of joyous effervescence I feel (when I get it), quite unlike anything else. Well, maybe that's an over statement; I get something close to it in a good music jam with my bluegrassey friends, and I feel so full of the happiness of the moment I can't stand still, and thank goodness for guitar straps so that I can bounce and play and sing all at the same time. But in that case, I'm content to just enjoy the joy of the moment.
I suspect that there might be something more to the story of this sensation in yoga literature; I'd like to see a story about what that's all about, in the terms of the practice itself, even if it sounds all woo-woo. (because either there is some kind of story, or I'm completely weird. but I don't think I'm completely weird. just a little weird.) I >think<, and this is a total hunch, that the sensation is indicative of making some sort of progress or headway in the practice. I think that's a really good thing, and whatever that right thing I did was, I'd like to pursue that - and not, in truth, just for the sake of getting that vibratey-bubbley feeling. To be honest, I think I'd rather like to learn to put a damper on when it occurs so that I'm not internally bouncing around for hours. Too much of a good thing, and all that.
But what did I do right? So far as my primitive understanding of yoga goes, all I've got to work with are the asanas and getting into good alignment and good breath. Well, I think I've also got some intuitions, but they seem quite vague. Did I simply do a better version of triangle? Is there something more? Did I do a better job of opening up? What "opened", and what did I open up to? Did I plug into some extra something somewhere? What "plug," what "thing"? Was it a particular sort of mindfulness or meditativeness I managed to achieve? Was it the chanting? All the above? In short, I don't even think I have an adequate vocabulary to voice things.
So there's the long story about why the sensation of happiness itself wasn't sufficient as a stopping place for me, and motivated me off to a bookstore the other day. I wasn't distressed or unhappy, about being happy. But did want some kind of better feel or understanding about what it's all about. And now, midway through one book I acquired, I am glad to see that there are frequent mentions of a joy that come associated with the practice, so I'm relieved to think I'm definitely not crazy. :-)
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